Ah the joys of a new year and all the after effects of the
holiday: the bills, the weight gain, the family fights. Not to mention being off of your schedule
because of days off and shortened work days.
Then you get back to normal and your like what the heck I want to be
off. It’s a tug of war that sucks donkey
balls. Then you start making new year’s
resolutions that last maybe the entire month of January, like going to the
gym. You sign up and start going only to
find that its packed because everyone has had the same idea. You stop going without realizing that if you just
hung on to that treadmill a little longer the gym would clear out after a month
and you have your choice of bikes and the regulars would have gotten used to
you by now and not giving you the look of death.
Then comes the winter blues.
You are tired of being stuck in the house because there is 25 feet of
snow blocking your door. The only way to
dig out is with a teaspoon and you have no place to put the snow other than the
kitchen sick because it can melt down the drain. You try this for about a week only to realize
its faster to let it melt naturally because using a vibrator only creates a
pile of snow in the house and you don’t have enough batteries to go past the
porch. When it all finally melts you are
like Yippee and start running around like a crazy person with your hands over your
head. Then comes the lawn mowing and the
lawn is super long and green from the 60 feet of snow that was on top of
it. It’s one big party year after year
or one be whine fest with cheese.
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